The thing about Batty is he asked me to help him and I couldn't. And I wouldn't put him through surgery. I believe that was the right choice but it hurt to make the choice. Only I made the choice to have him put to sleep. The other thing is I saw him die. With all the others, I wasn't looking in their eyes but, with him, I saw it. He was alive and he was dead and I don't know how you can be just switched off like that. It was so awful and I thought it was the worst thing ever to happen to me, but if I never see China again, that will be the worst.
I do understand dead and alive. I consign insects to death all the time and the only thing I can say for myself is that I feel bad about it. It's the same thing, they are switched off. I understand that everyone dies and that is how it's supposed to be. So, even though I have been inappropriately upset about Batman and even though I am crying right now, it's ok that he died, and I will get over it.
I just don't know how I am going to get over China.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment